i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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