i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
