I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
