people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
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