so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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