May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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