I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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