Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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