he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
