Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
