Is it normal to miss your booty call?
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
