Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
