Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
