yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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