woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
