What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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