I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
