My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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