scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
