we have pet lesbian snakes
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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