Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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