ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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