My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
