so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
