woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
