Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Randomize
