i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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