who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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