She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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