I want to have your abortion
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
