You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
