so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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