R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
