oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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