Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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