She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
this is an emotional support booty call
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Randomize
