Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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