a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I think I just shit out all my problems.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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