One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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