i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
