At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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