Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Girls should come with a carfax report
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
