Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
We need a shit load of segways right now
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
He literally asked permission to hit on me
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
