Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Randomize
