Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Randomize
