i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
