i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
