I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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