the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize