dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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